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Why am I doing this?

February 3, 2022. It's been a long time since I visited this page--I've never really been a blogger and I've been so busy! Just as COVID-19 hit the world, I was finishing my M.F.A., planning my presentation for a conference at The Kennedy Center in D.C., working on program design, workshops, and a stage adaptation of my book, Sophie's Gift, with puppets. So many things. I still have a lot going on, but it's very different now, which is probably a similar story to yours and others. I graduated just in time for lockdowns, my Kennedy Center thing was cancelled, no workshops could be held, I no longer had the prospect of students and family issues materialized. So many things. I've spent the last two years on 'pivoting' and family. "What's my pivot?" I've asked myself.

In between figuring it out and managing all of the 'new normals' and family needs, I ask myself, "Why am I doing this?" I mean, who really cares, after all?

Today, I was cleaning up files on my computer and I found a couple videos that reminded me of why and who. The video presented here is a lovely girl, Zoe, who, inspired by my Sophie character, wrote her own play, designed her puppets (one of them is her version of my Sophie) and put them into action on her deck. I never would have met Zoe (or her mom) if she hadn't popped into a Zoom room with her mom during a pandemic-inspired artist conference call. Zoe is why I do what I do.

I also do it because I need to--for myself--and I feel called to for children--including the child that lives inside each of us. I can't seem to set it aside--this creative thing that pushes its way through me, wanting to be born and shared. The last two years have been difficult. Watching the world spin and feeling separated from meaning-making...isolated...yet I press on, as we all must. I am so grateful to have connected with Zoe, to have found this video, this reminder, this sweet treat in the desert. Whew! Just what I need on this particular day. Thank you, Zoe!


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